This is a part of a special FLTP Blog Series, that follows Two Fearless Living Training Program students as they documented their journey going through the program each week. Laurie Weaver created the beautiful images and Juile Panhke Nelson wrote about her experience, both inspired by each week while in the FLTP program.
Week 6, Wheel of Freedom
Guest Blogger, Julie Jahnke Nelson
Finding courage I didn’t know I had
This week has been about freedom and finding out what my essential nature is. Yahoo!! The Wheel of FREEDOM! This is beyond exciting. I feel so happy and hopeful. My wheel of fear has been spinning for too long. Now I have a cure for what ails me. It’s time to counteract fear with my Wheel of Freedom. Now when I’m feeling incompetent (my fear trigger), I can switch to my essential nature, which is courageous. This is so empowering. This is helping me break through the walls that have blocked me and held me back. It’s changing my life. I can feel it working already.
I learned that my Wheel of Freedom is inherent within me. It’s part of who I am, so I don’t have to force it. I just have to recognize it in myself. That means I’m courageous, which means I’m a risk taker. It means I don’t have to be afraid of leaving my comfort zone; I can move past my fear and do the things I really want to do in my heart and soul. It means I can enjoy the thrill of doing those things. Stretching and risking can be exciting for me, not something I have to be afraid of. The courage I need is inside of me. Being on my Wheel of Freedom is allowing me to pursue my dreams.
Now I see the world differently
I know now that I was meant to be courageous. I’ve seen it in certain areas of my life, but now I know I can apply it to all areas of my life. I’ve always been in awe of other people who are courageous, and I’m impressed by their courageous actions and “going for it.” I haven’t always given myself credit for the times I’ve demonstrated courage. I think I noticed it in others, because that’s my essential nature, and there was a connection there. My Wheel of Fear told me I could NEVER be like them! When in fact, I’m exactly like them. I AM courageous.
I used to worry if something didn’t happen the way I had hoped, and I thought for sure it was because I did or said something wrong or I wasn’t good enough. I’d question myself or make stuff up in my head. Now I realize what was happening is that way down inside, without me even realizing it, I was telling myself, “You’re incompetent.” Now I can tell myself that I’m not incompetent, and in fact, I’m my essential nature, which is courageous. Now I see the world differently. Now I see myself differently.
In a world of fear, courage shines
Once I learned that my essential nature is courageous, I was curious about what it means to other people and how it’s defined, to see if it fits how I view it. As I read the definition and synonyms for courage, I saw myself, which validates for me that courage is my essential nature.
The American Heritage® Dictionary defines courage as, “The state or quality of mind or spirit that enables one to face danger or fear with self-possession, confidence, and resolution; bravery.” The definition of resolution is, “Firm determination; resolve to do something; course of action determination or decided on.” Synonyms for courage are endurance, tenacity, determination, will, invincibleness, gumption, heart, nerve, and grit. I can definitely see myself in these definitions and words. I am those words. I am courage, and I shine!
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