This is a part of a special FLTP Blog Series, that follows Two Fearless Living Training Program students as they documented their journey going through the program each week. Laurie Weaver created the beautiful images and Juile Panhke Nelson wrote about her experience, both inspired by each week while in the FLTP program.
Week 7, Honoring Your Needs – Excuses and Forgiveness
Guest Blog Piece, Julie Jahnke Nelson
Excuses Excuse Us
Who knew excuses were a product of fear? I sure didn’t. They’re such a normal part of everyday life. Everyone has and uses excuses. They’re expected and accepted. This module caused a huge realization for me. Excuses seem like reasons – real reasons – but they’re not! I have so many excuses, especially around writing and losing weight. When I say, “I’m too tired,” “I’m terrible at meal planning,” or “I don’t have time to write,” it really feels like it’s true. But, even though excuses feel real, they’re not the real deal.
And my “Badge of Honor,” is my number one excuse! Wowza!! That makes so much sense to me now that I know what it is. Whenever the going gets tough, I go right to my Badge of Honor, and that’s all the excuse I need to convince myself that “it’s just not meant to be.” It always comes back to my Badge of Honor, my number one excuse, time and time, again.
Excuses excuse, and they’ve excused me from realizing my dreams and stopped me from doing things I want to do. But that’s about to change.
Forgiveness Frees Us
It starts with forgiveness. Forgiving myself; forgiving others.
The forgiveness exercises have been the hardest for me, so far. I don’t think that’s unusual. We hear so much about how important forgiveness is, but it isn’t always so easy to do. The Fearbuster exercises helped me take baby steps toward forgiving, and then I was able to take it deeper and deeper.
I think it can be hardest sometimes to forgive ourselves. I have thoughts like, “I should’ve known better.” And “I should’ve done things differently.” I have a lot of expectations and judgment when it comes to some of my past actions (or inactions). I avoided it for a while, but the “Forgiveness Contract” was HUGE once I did it. Like a weight was lifted. Like the clouds parted, and the sun came out. It was difficult at first, but when I finally did it, it was very freeing. It was another cleansing exercise that moved me, and I could feel the shift as I went through it.
The Fearless Living Training Program isn’t easy work. It’s hard and it’s challenging me to dig deep and look at myself and admit some things. But it’s sooooo worth it. The payoff is huge. I’m in week 7, and I’ve grown and shifted so much already. I know I still have a long way to go, but what I’ve seen so far has been incredible.
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