What I've Gained From Writing: Keeping It In vs. Saying It Out Loud

From Fear to Freedom
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My dear cousin Kandi nudged me to read aloud some chapters of my fifth book: my memoir. Yikes! As she recovers from a brutal back and neck surgery, it was the distraction both of us needed.

Rhonda and cousin Kandi

Kandi asked me what I'm gaining from writing this book....

I spit out my answer immediately... writing my memoir has SET ME FREE. (even in ways I didn't know I needed to be set free.)

Putting things in writing. Seeing them in print. Reading them aloud.

  • Shame has dissolved.
  • Hidden anger has subsided.
  • Only absolute awe and acceptance, and appreciation of my journey are left.
  • I smile more!

Here are a few more things I've gained...

Close up view of the hand of a woman writing in her diary at sunset with the glowing orb of the sun reflected over a still ocean

1. I'm discovering myself in a whole new way.

When you write without thinking or planning but simply with a theme in mind or question, words and stories show up that you may not remember experiencing. It's amazing how healing it is to see your story unfold with no judgment or regret when you're willing to say it out loud rather than keeping it to yourself.

2. My inner life is showing up in black and white.

Most of us don't spend time exploring our emotional life. We know we have feelings but do not necessarily understand those feelings or learn from them.

Writing my memoir has shown me the level of depth I had as a young girl and the conflicting struggles I felt making changes that would frighten almost anyone. And God, was I courageous.

3. I have found my voice.

When I send pages to my advisor in my MFA program, and he suggests a change, I'm not the same girl who would have thought, "he knows more than me," and made the change without thinking.

No, this time. I read my advisor's suggestion. Look at how I express it, and more often, choose mine. I want my book to read as ME even if I can only achieve B-level writing.

4. I love, appreciate, and respect my journey so much more.

The horrible dates I had, my out-of-control drinking, and the neglect I experienced are mine, all mine. And as I write, I can see the throughline between one event and the next and how all of my life experiences—good, bad, or ugly—made me me.

(I learned life lessons the hard way, that's for sure, but writing about it has made me see it through a completely different lens.)

5. My heart is open and compassion flows.

Writing has opened my heart in unexpected ways. I'm so grateful.

And this is just the beginning... So much is possible with writing. For myself and for you!

  • Healing through writing.
  • Loving ourselves through writing.
  • Discovering who we are through writing.

Writing is a powerful tool for fighting fear.

Fearless Writing is about being willing to practice listening to your inner voice and trusting yourself to write it down.

If this calls to you and you crave accountability to put your writing first twice a month, join me for Fearless Writing Group.

From Fear to Freedom
From Fear to Freedom GUIDE topaz enhance sharpen hiresDOWNLOAD GUIDE

My dear cousin Kandi nudged me to read aloud some chapters of my fifth book: my memoir. Yikes! As she recovers from a brutal back and neck surgery, it was the distraction both of us needed.

Rhonda and cousin Kandi

Kandi asked me what I'm gaining from writing this book....

I spit out my answer immediately... writing my memoir has SET ME FREE. (even in ways I didn't know I needed to be set free.)

Putting things in writing. Seeing them in print. Reading them aloud.

  • Shame has dissolved.
  • Hidden anger has subsided.
  • Only absolute awe and acceptance, and appreciation of my journey are left.
  • I smile more!

Here are a few more things I've gained...

Close up view of the hand of a woman writing in her diary at sunset with the glowing orb of the sun reflected over a still ocean

1. I'm discovering myself in a whole new way.

When you write without thinking or planning but simply with a theme in mind or question, words and stories show up that you may not remember experiencing. It's amazing how healing it is to see your story unfold with no judgment or regret when you're willing to say it out loud rather than keeping it to yourself.

2. My inner life is showing up in black and white.

Most of us don't spend time exploring our emotional life. We know we have feelings but do not necessarily understand those feelings or learn from them.

Writing my memoir has shown me the level of depth I had as a young girl and the conflicting struggles I felt making changes that would frighten almost anyone. And God, was I courageous.

3. I have found my voice.

When I send pages to my advisor in my MFA program, and he suggests a change, I'm not the same girl who would have thought, "he knows more than me," and made the change without thinking.

No, this time. I read my advisor's suggestion. Look at how I express it, and more often, choose mine. I want my book to read as ME even if I can only achieve B-level writing.

4. I love, appreciate, and respect my journey so much more.

The horrible dates I had, my out-of-control drinking, and the neglect I experienced are mine, all mine. And as I write, I can see the throughline between one event and the next and how all of my life experiences—good, bad, or ugly—made me me.

(I learned life lessons the hard way, that's for sure, but writing about it has made me see it through a completely different lens.)

5. My heart is open and compassion flows.

Writing has opened my heart in unexpected ways. I'm so grateful.

And this is just the beginning... So much is possible with writing. For myself and for you!

  • Healing through writing.
  • Loving ourselves through writing.
  • Discovering who we are through writing.

Writing is a powerful tool for fighting fear.

Fearless Writing is about being willing to practice listening to your inner voice and trusting yourself to write it down.

If this calls to you and you crave accountability to put your writing first twice a month, join me for Fearless Writing Group.

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