Charis was a successful entrepreneur in a great marriage --butshe wasn’t happy. She felt unsatisfied and “stuck” in her life but didn’t understand why.
Using the Fearless Living Training Program
Charis discovered that her feeling “stuck” was the result of a deeper fear. And she learned how to overcome the fears that were holding her back from a more authentic, fulfilling life.
Charis is now thriving in her career and relationships. She is no longer driven by fear and instead lets her “inner voice” guide her. As a result, she’s much happier and feels a stronger sense of purpose in her life
“I felt stuck...”
On the outside, Charis Santilliehad a great life. She had a successful career and a great marriage.
But she wasn’t happy.
She kept setting career and life goals for herself. She always thought that if she hit these goals, then she would be happy. But it never worked out that way.
For example, Charis spent nine months working day-and-night on a product launch for her company. The launch was a huge success. Charis expected to feel euphoric, but instead, she felt empty. Hitting her goal didn’t change anything. As she says:
“I was a successful entrepreneur, but I wasn’t fulfilled. Something was missing..I thought the key to happiness was achieving my goals but it doesn’t work that way.”
“Why is this still bothering me?”
After the product launch, Charis went to a networking event. She talked to some people there about how she felt stuck. One person asked, “Why are you paralyzed?” and then it hit her:
Charis thought back to when she was 19. Her family was in a horrific hot air balloon accident. Her father, who was a successful self-made businessman, became paralyzed.
Her family ended up losing everything --their business, their home, their cars, and they eventually went bankrupt. Charis thought she had processed her grief around this incident in therapy. But this made her realize there was still pain there. And she thought this pain may be connected to how she felt stuck.
The nextday, she talked to Rhonda Britten. Rhonda had spoken at the event about how incidents from childhood lead us to develop fears that control our life. And how this happens to everyone --even people with no major traumatic events --without us realizing it.
Charis shared her story with Rhonda. She told Rhonda about her frustration that this event was still causing problems in her life.
Rhonda assured her it was normal to feel that way. She said everyone has events from their past that unknowingly influence how they think, feel, and act. And that the fact she still struggled with it was okay.
“I said to Rhonda, ‘Why am I feeling like this? Why am I so emotional? I’m a grown woman, why is this still bothering me? Why now? What’s going on?’
Rhonda looked at me and said, “You’re right on time.”
“It was a reality check...”
Charis realized she needed to resolve the issues from her past. And she still needed help getting “unstuck.” So she hired Rhonda to be her Life Coach.
Working together, Charis discovered how fear we develop as kids can run our life without us realizing.
She saw that issues she struggled with --including perfectionism, procrastination, being a workaholic --were all responses to a deep rooted fear she had. And she learned how to stop fear from running her life.
Her work with Rhonda was so helpful that she joined Rhonda’s Fearless Living Training Program. This way, she could get an even deeper understanding of how to stop fear from controlling her.
“It was a reality check that, ‘Wow, something that happened a long time ago is still having an impact on me that I didn’t realize because there are some unprocessed emotions.’”
“It made a lot of things clearer...”
Through the Fearless Living Training Program, Charis discovered her “core negative feeling”.
This is something everyone has. We develop it as children and spend the rest of our lives afraid of experiencing it. Our attempts to avoid this feeling lead to many of the problems we experience in our relationships, career, finances, and happiness. And we don’t even realize what’s happening.
For example, Charis discovered her core negative feeling was disappointment. The thought of disappointing others terrified her.
Fear of disappointment was driving her life without Charis realizing it. Much of the perfectionism, workaholism, and procrastination she experienced came as a result of a deep fear of disappointing others.
This was also the reason she felt “stuck” in life. She had been living her life to avoid this fear as opposed to doing what her heart and soul truly wanted. She wasn’t being authentic and living for herself. She was living her life based on how other people would think of her.
“Every time you take the Fearless Living Training Program, you get something out of it. I took it again and learned even more about myself. My core trigger was different than I thought. I figured that out, and it made things a lot clearer.”
“I found the path to inner peace...”
Charis didn’t just learn how many problems in her life were secretly caused by fear. She also learned how to overcome that fear and stop it from ruining her life.
For example, Charis learned how to find her “Essential Nature.” This is who she truly is. When you are connected to your Essential Nature, you feel much more peace, love, and joy. You’re happy and fulfilled regardless of the circumstances around you.
Your Essential Nature is always there. And Charis learned how to tap into hers anytime.
She felt as if she had uncovered who she really was. Like she had found her true self which had always been there, but she had never fully connected with until now.
“What I found was my beautiful spirit waiting for me to trust her and set her free...”
“When I listen to my inner voice, things work out better...”
Finding her Essential Nature made it easier for Charis to connect with her “inner voice”.
This is the soft, quiet voice that guides us from within. (Some call it “intuition” or “divine spirit” or “guidance” or our “gut.”)
This helped Charis to stop overthinking. She’s able to make decisions without worrying if it’s the right thing to do. And when she follows her inner voice, things generally turn out better than expected.
For example, once COVID-19 hit, she had a lot of uncertainty around her business. But Charis didn’t panic. She simply relaxed and followed her intuition.
Her intuition told her to hire a CEO. It even guided her to select the right one. And she ended up with a wonderful CEO who was perfect for the job.
“It’s taken me 40-something years to finally start listening to my inner voice --my calm, quiet whisper that is intuitive and honest and caring and loving and knows what I should do...
When I can listen to that inner voice, things go well or work out better than I anticipated.”
“Fearless Living saved my relationships...”
The lessons in the Fearless Living Training Program helped Charis in her relationships, too.
She used to find herself arguing a lot. And she was always obsessed with winning the argument.
But Charis learned how fear was the cause of all that. And now, she almost never argues. Instead, she empathizes with the other person.
Her relationships with her father, husband, and others have become more loving as a result. Because she no longer has frequent arguments thatpull her and her loved ones apart. Now, she’s able to connect with them and have deeper conversations that bring them closer together.
“I can look at the other person now and have more compassion about what’s going on with them.
It’s not that I’m telling myself, “Pick your battles.” I can look at the other person and be like, “Wow they just got triggered.”
I may not understand why, but I can see it and have compassion and think, “How can I help them now?” Because they are on a Wheel of Fear right now,and I don’t want them to be there.”
“I pursue things that make me happy...”
Charis loved the Fearless Living Training Program so much, she wanted to help others experience the same transformations she had.
Her inner voice guided her to join Rhonda Britten’s Life Coaching Certification program. There, she learned how to help others escape fear and be themselves more fully.
She still has her other businesses, but being a Life Coach has helped her feel even more fulfilled and lit up each day.
“I make more time for things other than work. I really pursue things that make me happy, are fulfilling, and give me passion and purpose. That’s why I’m a life coach now.”